"Free Hands" & You B%^&h

So Isaac and I were in the bathroom yesterday so he could go pee pee.  John and I have noticed that Isaac will willingly pee by himself if he isn't holding a toy, but is hesitant to put down toys (because he doesn't want his brother to have any fun) so he will ask for assistance when he is holding a toy in hand.  That was kind of a break through because we could never figure out why he could go sometimes and not others. The unfortunate result in "holding toys over the potty" is that inevitably they end up falling in the toilet.  We have had multiple causalities over the past week.  So yesterday, back to the bathroom, a "View Master" card fell in a toilet of fresh pee.  Gross.  So I pulled it out of the toilet and threw it away and told him that if we put toys down before we went pee pee we wouldn't have to throw so many pee stained toys away.  To which he replied - "You Bi&*h."
"Excuse me" I said in shock that he had even heard that word - not one I typically use.  And then he swung his arm in front of him and with enthusiasm said it again "You Bi^&h".  I instantly realized that he was attempting to say "You Betcha", but was living off a critical syllable. We have been practicing A LOT on saying the full word.
You Betcha.

The Wrong Guy

Today was our first day of VBS. We had to miss days 1 and 2 because I had to work. Typically the boys have only been old enough for the worker's room, but today Eli got to go to VBS as a "big boy." Eli was too funny in the car on the way home.

Eli: Mom - we talked about God today, not Jesus, you had the wrong guy.

Me: Eli what were your teacher's names.
Eli: I forgot to ask. Dang it Eli, be brave!!

Park Photos

Woody

Eli likes to come out of his room dressed some mornings. Today he dressed up as Woody.

Yes his shirt is VERY tight.

Yes his pants are on backwards.

100 Butts

Isaac is smart. At three Isaac has learned to work the system to get what he wants. So this morning after breakfast after saying "I'm done, I want to get down" about 50 times back-to-back he decided to go a different direction.
"I need to poop NOW!" He knows that this usually gets him down because no one wants to mess with pants full of poop. So as I get him down from his high chair John says, "I bet you one hundred bucks you aren't going to poop."
Isaac replied," I DON'T HAVE 100 BUTTS - just ONE and it's GOING to POOP."
And he did, after about 20 minutes....

Qualified

Last Sunday Eli's Sunday School class had a parent filling in for their usual Sunday School Teacher Ms. Kristin. Eli just loves Ms. Kristin so he has a bit sad that she wasn't there for Sunday School.
He asked Ms. C (the parent kind enough to step in) "Why Are you here? Do you even know what you are doing?"
We all got a really good laugh!

In My Heart

Not sure why my posts have been so few and far between. The boys are still being hilarious.
So today Eli has been more affectionate than usual and I gave him a big hug and said I just hate that you are growing up. I want you to be small forever. And the conversation goes:

Eli: Mom I have to grow that is how God made me.
Me: Well I will just have to talk to God about it.
Eli: I don't think he will be able to hear you since he lives in outer space.
Me: Hon, you have learned in church that God lives in our heart.
Eli: Oh, well then I can open my mouth so you can yell at him.