Picture Day

The boys are getting all handsomed up today for their "school pictures". I was trying to talk it up to Eli so that he would be extra well behaved.
The Conversation:
Mom: You are going to get your picture taken today.
Eli: Why?
Mom: Because Mommy thinks you and Isaac are handsome little boys so she wants to have a picture to hang on the wall.
Eli: No mommy - I don't want to hang on the wall, I will fall off and then bonk my head and I will cry.

A literal interpretation.

The Terror Trail

Today has been a fun filled day. We have been in the company of many of our favorite under-four-feet, people. This morning our friends Baelyn and Kaeley came over. It is amazing how differently girls and boys play. Boy play can usually fall into four areas:
1) Building Stuff
2) Throwing Stuff
3) Decimating Stuff
4) Hitting Stuff
But today I got to be a queen with two servant girls and order them around - at least that was the storyline I was given.
Then this afternoon we met Mac for a picnic at Waveland. We had a great time. While trecking our way through the trail Mac, Eli, and Isaac performed a scene from a two year old horror flick...

The kids are asleep, nothing funny is happening, so this is a political one, sorry...

I thought I would warn you in case you wanted to skip this one. I think this presidential race is facinating. I have been glued to, and disecting, speechs from both sides. So yesterday John (not McCain, Collins) and I were going through the web looking at tax return information for the three candidates that have been released. I thought it was worth sharing. I am sharing information all from the same source on three of the candidates so that they are all biased in the same direction, whatever that means.

Barack Obama
http://taxprof.typepad.com/taxprof_blog/2008/03/obama-releases.html

Joe Biden
http://taxprof.typepad.com/taxprof_blog/2008/09/biden-releases.html

John McCain
http://taxprof.typepad.com/taxprof_blog/2008/04/mccain-releases.html

A Beautiful Song

This is Eli's debut piano concerto. The piece begins with a stirring rendition of We Will Rock You, followed by a "beautiful song" in various keys.

The Sickie

Isaac is sick - has been since yesterday. He has the croup, which I mistakenly thought had been eradicated in 1890. I actually laughed when the doctor diagnosed that. Anyway in normal people terms in means that he has a lot of stuff in his chest and throat. He has so much phlegm that he is choking on it and I am just waiting for him to gag and puke on me. I really think everyone should be puked on at least once a month because it really puts things into perspective. I think a person would think - "Man I hate going to work, but it is better than being puked on" or "Sitting in traffic sucks - but so does being puked on it." See how much happier everyone would be. I have answers.

So you know - we are an ultra safe house. Please bring your kids over.

We have also revamped our time out practices:

So far so good.

Our Kidless Counterparts

Last night we attended a joint birthday party for two of John's co-workers. Bravely they invited our kids over as well. Have you ever seen the SNL skit when Dan Akryod is trying to sell various children's toys such as bag o' glass and Johnny switchblade because he feels like a Nerf ball is a choking hazard. Sometimes that is what going to a childless perons's house is like. While the gesture is incredible, that a person would allow two people under three feet tall to completely ransack their tidy house. However, for a parent this evening out is most exhausting. Below are the top ten reasons childless/single folks should not let children come to their homes.

10. 80 pound dogs that aren't used to kids & kids that are not used to 80 pound dogs.
9. The line between dog toys and kid toys is very blurry.
8. Low level TV's without the power button protector. You will miss every good play.
7. 75 2x3 pictures don't look like a precious display of the family, but instead they look like blocks that make a nifty people pyramids. They are most tempting.
6. Coke Cans - they will get shaken and dropped no less than 10 times, each.
5. Outside seems safer, except dog poop looks a little like playdoh (at least the kind of church that is a mixture every color squished together).
4. Corn Hole is not for playing - it is a stage for singing and jumping.
3. Glass hutches full of knicknacks. They can tip over, my kid will prove that to you.
2. Fire place pokers and brooms have far more than the advertised uses.
1. White carpet.

We had a good time. Eli had his first Mello Yellow. Isaac I am sure touched dog poop at least three times. Eli's church pants look like he rolled around in the grass for 2 hours (which he did). And - we were exhausted.

The Library

This morning our excursion began with a trip to the doctor - a five minute trip turned one hour. The boys were excellent so I rewarded them with a trip to the library - lame, I know. It was story time and Eli made it very clear from the gitgo that he, and I quote, "didn't want to learn today" so we skipped story time and went straight to the train table and toys. So yes, we were the family that was making all the noise during story time distracting all of the kiddos. We got a good 45 minutes in and so I gave the boys a three minute warning (I used to do 5, but Eli always said, "No, 3 mom" - so three it is). By then they were running around the story circle (now abondanded by the story time crowd). I knew this exit was not going to be graceful. So I finally announced it was time to go grocery shopping and the drama began. Eli starts running faster, singing "We Will Rock You," I am getting librarian stares. So I gently grab is little hand and start heading towards the door - his response "No mommy, not time to go, I want to stay and learn. No No NOT TIME TO GO I WANT TO LEARN." Yep - so I am the mommy jerk that wants her kid to start reading in the 8th grade. Where's my "Mother of the Year" crown?

Buried Alive

The other afternoon Eli woke up uncharacteristically early from his nap and was talking away in his Toddlerese (thanks Jen). And then silence - which is always scary. I let the silence continue on for about 30 minutes and then stuck my head in his room to check on him. He had been so busy rearranging his room he passed out in his bed. Somehow during is five minutes of wakefullness he had translpanted everything in his room that was not bolted down into his bed. Resulting in....

Zoomed out....

In a year and a half....

When Eli was 6 months old we found out we were pregnant with Isaac. It was quite a shock. Our "spacious" Honda Accord and first home seemed at once like a matchbox. We were surprised of course, but also a little sad that neither child would get the one on one attention that any good parent would like to bestow on their children. But last night as they wrestled on the floor giggling and speaking this foreign language that only they understand I realized what a blessing having two so close will be. They honestly don't enjoy being awake without the other one and they will literally stand outside the other's door pecking on it until the sleeping brother wakes up. God knew.

On a more painful note - my feet have been bothering me for months. I would exercise for 45 minutes one day and be unable to walk for the next three. I always figured it was my feet's way of telling me that I need to loose weight and that they can't stand the extra pressure, but evidently I have something called plantar fasciitis - which according to Wilkipedia (the source of everything trustworthy) is caused by: weight gain, jobs that require a lot of walking on hard surfaces, shoes with little or no arch support, and inactivity. So I was right. The doc said I should stretch out my feet 6 times a day and that it should go away in about a month. To which John replied, "You did tell the doctor that you are so unlimber that you can't touch your toes, so it is going to take a year and a half for you to be able to touch your toes and then another month to be able to walk again." Funnily, I left that part out....

I am going to exercise, tomorrow.....

Where's the Dragon?

Today was my cousin Jackie's wedding. Consequently, it was the first one we braved with the boys. The wedding was held in a historic church downtown - it was really, really beautiful inside. As a distraction I was talking to Eli about all of the old lights and designs on the walls - and then pointed out the huge, beautiful stained glass windows. Eli asked, "Oh, so when is the dragon coming."
For all of the good parents who don't let their children watch TV, Eli was referring to the scene in Shrek when Fiona is getting married and the dragon crashes the party. So, it is a little embarrassing to admit that Eli has seen the movie enough to put the wedding and dragon together, but we all got a good laugh out of it.
No dragon today.

The Entourage

Isaac and Eli have a few friends that get through the night. Isaac’s “lovie” of choice is a night-time Tigger holding a Roo stuffed animal. Very sweet and cute. For over a year now Eli has quite a group that he sleeps with. He has Sadie (a rather large dog), monkey, turtle (creative names, I know), a soccer ball pillow, and a baseball glove pillow. Sometimes I wonder how he fits in the bed with all of the company. Turtle is the most beloved and went missing Wednesday night. While not teary eyed, Eli was concerned about his bedmate and asked John and I to look for it. We did to no avail, but Eli seemed to make it through the night. On Thursday morning when I went in to get Eli dressed he was sitting up – immediately asking if Turtle had been found, no luck. I asked him if he Turtle had told him of any trips he was interested in taking or had any friends he wanted to see. Nope. Where could he be? Well, he was in the hamper, not sure how he got there but I told Eli that Turtle was playing hide and seek and was giggling because we hadn’t found him. The reunion was lovely Eli introduced Turtle back to Sadie and monkey and told them how much they missed him. Last night when I went to check on him before we went to bed he was asleep – on top of Turtle hugging is little neck so tight. It is amazing the little world children create.

A sensitive side

Our friend Kristin came over for dinner tonight. Eli sat in her lap while we were watching a movie and said, "You are so cold - let me turn the fan off." He proceeded over to the light switch a turned off the light a fan, saying "now you'll feel better." Not bad for a three year old who thinks asking nicely means to include the word "NOW" in the request.

On an Isaac note, he gassed us really loud at dinner tonight and John said, "What do you say Isaac". Isaac said, "Gwooss."

My Crap!

When we were leaving Eli & Isaac's school today Eli was carrying his craft - a construction paper watermelon with sunflower seeds for seeds.
The wind was blowing and Eli said, "Hey you, Wind, stop it, you are blowing my crap."
I just had to laugh, and reiterate - craft, craft, craft...

Boy Time

I started attending a Bible study this Sunday - so the weekly boy time from 4:45 - 6:30 on Sunday's has begun. When I came home this week they were all propped up on pillows eating popcorn and watching a movie. I keep trying to convince John there is room for at least two more on that couch. He disagrees.



Also - Eli taught us some Bible this weekend...

I guess we will have less gas...

Isaac has a crazy amount of allergies. His ever growing list includes: peanuts, soy, fish, eggs, oats, garlic, cinnamon, chocolate, grass, mold, and ragweed. We have learned to deal pretty well. I have learned to bake without eggs, shop to avoid soy (which is in everything), and even to bake bread - there is only one type of one brand that Isaac can eat. The peanut allergy is the big one, although it is kind of the easiest to avoid. In case you didn't know, peanuts are a legume, not a nut, so he is also allergic to beans. BEANS! It is our winter staple food. Chili, black bean dip, baked beans, antijito minis, soup, hummus, white bean dip, the list goes on and on. So I guess the good side, less gas and a better smelling home.

On a sunnier note the boys got hair cuts today. Eli, in his usual sense of humor said to the barber/stylist, "Hey you, stop that, you are making my hair fall out."

Eli-isms

Eli: Mom, don't talk to Monkey - he is in time out.
Me: What did he do?
Eli: He pushed down turtle.
Of course...



We have an evening ritual of tickling the boys feet after bath time - everyone gets the giggles. I was acting like I was biting Eli's feet...



Eli: Mom, don't bite my feet, I not corn.